The ritual of Marriage has been a prevalent ritual worldwide
for millennia. In religious practices such as Christianity this ritual is
considered both a holy process and sacramental. In other religious traditions
such as Islam the ritual and marital process while lacking such holy and divine
implications does maintain both a social and cultural implication which transforms the Marital ritual from a
simple ‘event’ into a process by which someone lives their life.
While Islamic unions are more than a simple ritual of
marriage they do maintain the ritualistic process known in western societies as
a wedding. In Islamic cultures this is simply referred to as Nikaah. A significant number of Islamic Nikaah vary in their process and this is
generally due to cultural influence of the regions from which the Islamic participants
originate. Most Nikaah do however
follow a similar structure which is laid out by Muslim tradition and typically
remain untouched by cultural influence. The whole process begins with the engagement.
While in western tradition we are familiar with the man meets woman scenario
most of the Islamic faith, particularly those of the Asian region of Islam are
arranged into marriage by their parents. The logic formed behind this practice
is that parents know their children better than most and that it is one of
their final duties to see their children settled into their life. After the
arrangement is made it is usually up to the Woman to approach the man with the engagement
proposal, typically through a male intermediary who more times than not is a
relative. Contracts are signed and engagement is official. At this point in the
process two aspects come into play (Confetti, 2005). The first is the Mahr. The Mahr is what is known to most as a Dowry. This Dowry for all intent
and purposes is the woman’s to use as she wishes. Allah says, “And give to
the women their dowry with a good heart, but if they out of their own good
pleasure remit any part of it to you, take it and enjoy it without fear of any
harm." (Al-Nisa 4:4). The second aspect is that of the
engagement period. This period lasts for three months, after which if Nikaah hasn’t occurred engagement contracts
are required to be renewed.
The Nikaah itself holds the air of simplicity as dictated by Islam. The actual wedding process is very simple. It usually occurs at a mosque and is led by an Imam; however this isn’t always the case. Any educated Islamic man can carry out the marital process so long as the other requirements are met. Prophet Muhammad spoke, "There is no marriage except with a wallee and trustworthy witnesses.". A Wallee is otherwise known as the Bride’s guardian. While the Wallee and two witnesses are required for the process to be official, the bride herself is not. While this occurrence isn’t common it is possible. Traditionally though the Nikaah or wedding day is a well attended event with both the bride and groom, Wallee, Two witnesses, an Imam and a large number of guests. The Imam more often than not will give a short sermon and readings from the Qur’an which will all be followed by the signing of the marital contract. Once the process is complete another very important aspect of the ritual takes place. For newly married Islamic couples publicising and advertising the newly formed union is very important. This is normally done in what the western world would know as a reception but for Muslims is known as a Walima (Confetti 2005). The very purpose of the Walima is that, a reception to acclaim the newly-wed couple.
The Nikaah itself holds the air of simplicity as dictated by Islam. The actual wedding process is very simple. It usually occurs at a mosque and is led by an Imam; however this isn’t always the case. Any educated Islamic man can carry out the marital process so long as the other requirements are met. Prophet Muhammad spoke, "There is no marriage except with a wallee and trustworthy witnesses.". A Wallee is otherwise known as the Bride’s guardian. While the Wallee and two witnesses are required for the process to be official, the bride herself is not. While this occurrence isn’t common it is possible. Traditionally though the Nikaah or wedding day is a well attended event with both the bride and groom, Wallee, Two witnesses, an Imam and a large number of guests. The Imam more often than not will give a short sermon and readings from the Qur’an which will all be followed by the signing of the marital contract. Once the process is complete another very important aspect of the ritual takes place. For newly married Islamic couples publicising and advertising the newly formed union is very important. This is normally done in what the western world would know as a reception but for Muslims is known as a Walima (Confetti 2005). The very purpose of the Walima is that, a reception to acclaim the newly-wed couple.
While Islamic marriage isn’t divine, the lifestyle
ritual of this commitment maintains the baser tenets of the Islamic tradition.
Part of this is consent. Out of everything that occurs in the marital process the
consent of both parties is by far one of the most important aspects. It is
forbidden within the tradition to trick or coerce two people together (Maqsood,
R 2009). Like this the core tenets of Islam plays out in the day to day ritual
of married life. The teaching and maintaining of Islamic practices within a
household is another element that is held in very high regard towards the
marital commitment. This is where the concept of the marital ritual being more
than just a wedding really comes into play. The very idea of union within Islam
is for the psychological effect of it playing on the Pillars and teachings of
the Qur’an. In being married the couple can depend on each other and not only
provide but also support each other through life.
While in religions such as Christianity some marital
practices like divorce and polygamy are frowned upon. In Islam however it is in some ways the
opposite. Take divorce for example. While Muslims know that Allah allows
divorce out of simple practicality and reality it is also known that it is
probably the least liked practice out of those allowed. Islam is practical in
that sense, identifying that there are circumstances where divorce is required.
Similarly polygamy or the practice of taking multiple wives isn’t frowned upon
in Islam like it is in other religions and cultures. Islam is more than open to
this practice but teachings are conscious to point out that taking multiple
wives means that the man has to provide equally for each and maintain a high
level of utility within the marriage to each of them. If a man is aware that he
cannot do this it is discouraged to take more wives.
The ultimate goal within the marriage ritual and the general
lifestyle reminiscent of this ritualistic process is everything that is laced
throughout Islam and the Qur’an; the most important of which is treating your
partner right and providing for them in such a way that everybody in the
relationship remains calm and happy.
